From the video it looks like a female. The dot should be on the pelvic fin (bottom fin). They always have a black area on the dorsal fin (top fin, with the sail). You're lucky, my pistol shrimp never comes out.
To throw another wrench in things--sometimes males have a spot that appears and disappears. I got a supposed bonded pair of Yasha's from Diver's Den--one had a spot and the other one didn't. Turns out both were male (the one without developed a spot over time). They sent me a replacement female, but now I have two males.
He doesn't. The two males try to fight each other (specifically, the larger male goes after the smaller one). The smaller one lives in my sump now. Haven't had time to figure out what I want to do with him.